I'm Diggin' on You...

So it turns out that I have some strange celebrity crushes. I am inviting you into the inner sanctum here, so don’t judge me! I also love lists, so I have sub-categorized said crushes into a handy reference guide:

Crushes from when I was a young lass:

- Captain Stubing from the Love Boat. There was something about those sassy white knee socks and short shorts, his witty one liners exchanged with guests like Meredith Baxter Birney and Charo, and his ability to guide that large ship to all sorts of exotic locations.

-The Pillsbury Doughboy. Is this weird? I just always thought he was real cute, and I liked that he giggled on command.

Shorties:

-Jeremy Piven. He is a small man, but he can deliver a punchline, yet can also deliver an earnest speech as seen in Serendipity.
-Bon Jovi. I saw his wax statue once, and he is very tiny. I think he came up to my shoulders, but he can wail, finally has a nice head of hair, and has been married to Dorthea for 23 years. Pretty impressive Jon Bon Jovi.
-Bob Costas. I have no explanation for this, but I kind of dig him.

Silver Foxes:

-Bob Barker. He can wield a Plinko chip as well as a golf club, and keeps $100 bills in his suit pockets. I miss him.
-Sean Connery. ‘Nuf said.

Complete Randoms:

-Simon Cowell. There is something about his sheer honesty, ugly haircut and devlish grin that combine to make a surprisingly attractive package.
-K-Fed. I’m sorry, but he’s strangely attractive. Popozao indeed!